Really I'm speechless. Except that I agree wholeheartedly with Ms. Teixeira de Jesus, learning how to kiss oneself is a worthy life pursuit; living any other way is just pure self-abuse, plain and simple.
''I called him John but also my darling and my sweet coconut,'' she said. ``He was a great kisser. I liked it so much that I bought a book to learn how to kiss myself.''
Uh, Ms. de Jesus, I think I'll be writing that book.
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